I’m doing it. Don’t try to argue with me. I won’t hear it. I’ve had this disgusting mole on my back forever and I’m getting rid of it and those gruesome hairs sticking up out of it. I’m getting

Chicago permanent hair removal

, laser scalping, or whatever it takes to banish this thing from my lower back forever. I wear a shirt all the time. Yeah, I know that’s hardly abnormal, but I can just feel people seeing that slight bulge. I know they know that it’s there. They can’t help but look. I don’t blame them either. I’d be doing the same thing if I walked past someone on the street with that thing. I’m not usually a paranoid person or anything either. I don’t think the government is tapping my phone lines or watching my every move with the use satellites orbiting the world for precisely that purpose. However, if they were, they would be looking right at that mole and the hairs sticking up out of it. But I don’t have to fret and fret over this thing forever. It will be gone soon and I’ll finally be able to walk around and not feel like everybody is watching me. I can finally be me again and it will be oh so glorious. SAINT PATRICKS DAY Every day, I look in the mirror and see a mask of freckles. They even dot all over my shoulders and down onto my back. I’ve thought about getting Chicago laser removal treatments to clear up at least some of it. I’m 36 years old for crying out loud. People look like me like I’m a 14 year old who’s gotten too much sun. I’ve always looked this way, but when I was younger I was younger. It didn’t matter. But now I’m a man and I know that I’m a man. I don’t want to be playing connect the dots with all of these freckles and drawing maps of various regions of the American Southwest on my shoulders. Do you have any idea how annoying it is to walk into a room and have someone say, ‘Hey, you must be Irish!’ and have this happen again and again and again. In every room I walk into. As you can imagine, Saint Patrick’s Day is an utter abominable nightmare for me. I see all those Irish flags waving and everyone’s outside,